So, the good news! My permit to hike the whole damn Pacific Crest Trail has been approved. At present there are four weeks and change left before I board a plane to San Diego and make my way to the monument and only half-a-handful of days remaining until I can print it.
We've also nearly completed our move from the US to Canada. There are still a few more hoops to jump through, but we've been tackling them as fast as possible. The boy and I crossed the continent in six days and only encountered two snow storms along the way. We've arrived to a very comfortable neighborhood and apartment. I go get my driver's license in a couple of hours.
I've also been working on bringing up my daily average walking distance. Just with an average amount of walking around town for errands and stuff I'm getting about 10 miles a day. It's not anywhere near where I'd hoped to be with this little time before start, but I'm bringing it up anticipating that I'll start slower than I'd have liked. C'est la vie.
Now the other side. I've been dealing with a looming sense of dread. I've been attempting to put my finger on what, exactly, I'm feeling anxiety about and I think most it boils down to this. I'm worried I'm going to get on the trail and let myself down.
That is, of course, mixed in with a smorgasbord of bonus worries headlined by everyone's favorites -- "You'll be flying on an airplane into uncontrolled-controlled airspace," "fascists at the boarder," and "fucking Trump." None of this is helped by endlessly doomscrolling news, social media, or even just overhearing Canadians talking about the madness while enjoying a cuppa at our neighborhood coffee stop. Without walking off into the sunset, I can't get away from it so I can walk off into the sunset.
Consequentially, I'm trying to be selective about which anxieties I'm dealing with head on. I've created a list of qualifications necessary for me to face.
- Must be related to the trail or moving/taking care of family,
- I should be able to do something to control it,
- and I should record incremental progress made.
As of yesterday I've started ticking off some of my more pressing concerns. Resupply remains a constant companion, but I'm beginning to form a "plan" in as much as I can. I've explored my options for transport to the monument and concluded that the best and most likely to succeed is to tweak my flight by a day and add a hotel night in San Diego. Then I'll have time to take care of some mailing and pre-supply chores before I board the shuttle. Finally, I've been tweaking my base weight and gear selection. There is snow on the ground here in BC right now so I can't really go try things out, but I understand things well enough that I anticipate I'll come to a conclusion before my flight.
Other things I need to address.
- Practice using my GPS in tracking mode
- Ensure that contact information is stored in my GPS
- Record postal stops for resupply boxes in my notebook
- Work out my hat dilemma
- Probably obsess over whether or not to bring a stupid camping pillow some more
- Sort out right knee pain
- And print-out then bronze my permit.
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